Frowning at his smile
by Kit Anipott
Summary: When he had told his friends about his and Paul's relationship, he hoped that someone would understand. That someone would take a closer look.  Sam laid his head on Jacob's chest.  "I'm so sorry, Jacob," he whispered.


Quill frowned.

"What happened to your face, Prettyboy?" he teased Jacob, who had shown up with a bruise on his cheek. Jacob chuckled.

"I stumbled and my face smashed into a brick wall," he answered. Quill and Embry laughed out loud.

"Way to go, Jake!" Embry mocked. Jacob just smiled and nodded. Quill stopped laughing and frowned again.

Jacob's smile seemed different. Almost weaker.

Jared frowned.

"What's that on your neck, Jake?"

Jacob turned away from his conversation with Leah to face Jared, and blushed. Jared grinned and touched the bruise on Jacob's neck.

"Aw, Jake got himself a girlfriend!" he teased, and Jacob's blush got even darker. Leah laughed and Paul raised a brow. Seth started jumping up and down while asking:

"Who, who, who, who, who?"

Jacob smacked Jared on the head.

"It's no one," he said, smiling. Jared frowned.

Jacob's smile was different. It didn't look real.

Embry frowned.

He couldn't believe his eyes!

He had been on his way to Jacob's house to visit, and when he came there he stopped dead in his tracks.

Jacob stood, pushed against a wall with his eyes closed and lips pressed against someone else. And that 'someone else' happened to be Paul Meraz. Embry hid behind a tree and watched as Jacob's mouth was being explored by Paul's tongue. The kiss was hungry and greedy. Almost violent.

Embry got worried when he saw a drop of blood fall from Jacob's split lip as the two ended the kiss.

Embry saw Paul reach out and touch Jacob's face. He put a thumb on Jacob's lips and pressed it down on the cut. Jacob winced, but smiled. Embry's frown got deeper.

Jacob's smile was painful.

Leah frowned.

Jacob had just told her, Quill, Sam, Seth and Jared about his and Paul's relationship.

"I… Guess I'm OK with that," Quill said and shrugged. "Still your best friend, mate." He gave Jacob a supportive grin.

Seth bit his lip worried.

"I don't know, Jake," he said. "Paul? He is so… Hotheaded."

Sam nodded in agreement.

Jacob smiled.

"I like him that way," he said. Leah frowned upset.

Jacob's smile wasn't fooling her.

Seth frowned.

Jacob had a swollen eye and a new bruise on his cheek. He looked tired and there was something lost about him.

Sam touched Jacobs face worried, and Jacob winced.

"Don't!" he almost yelled. Seth and Jared raised their brows in surprise. Sam moved his hand quickly, and Paul kept his poker face. Seth wondered why it was Sam who sat and worried about Jacob and not Jacob's boyfriend.

Sam was always this concerned about Jacob when he showed up with a bruise or a wound. Jacob would always say that he was clumsy and fell all the time, or he would tell them about some drunken idiots that randomly decided to beat the shit out of him.

But it was weird how Jacob suddenly got so unlucky.

Seth wondered if Sam had a crush on Jacob. He was always looking at him, always smiling at him. Always so concerned and worried about him.

Yeah, Seth recognized a good match when he saw it. Too bad Jacob was dating Paul.

Jared must have thought the same as Seth, cause out of nowhere he said;

"Watch out, Paul. Sam might steal your boyfriend."

Jared and Seth laughed. Jacob blushed and Sam tried to hide an amused smile as he looked down on the younger boy. Paul snorted, not amused. Jacob smiled, and Seth frowned again.

Jacob's smile was shivering. He was scared.

Sam frowned.

Jacob was obviously nervous. He kept looking behind his shoulder and rubbed his hands together.

They were on their way to Paul's house. It was late and it was dark outside when Sam had found Jacob walking on his own. He figured he should follow Jacob there.

Sam wanted to protect the younger boy, if he so had to catch a bullet for him. It was weird how hard Sam managed to fall for Jacob, even when Jacob wasn't even talking to him. Sam had done everything he could to get Jacob's attention and they ended up as friends. But not as good as Jacob and Embry. And Sam would never have Jacob like Paul did.

But Sam could wait. He could wait forever.

As they reached Jacob's house, Jacob turned and said goodbye before he walked towards the door.

"Wait!" Sam called after him, and Jacob turned around. Sam studied him. He wasn't handsome or cute. Not even hot. Those words didn't fit the boy in front of him.

No, beautiful was the right word. Fantastic, marvelous, amazing, stunning. It was hard to find words that were great enough.

And even if Sam ever found the perfect word for Jacob, he would never tell him. Because Jacob would never want to hear it from him.

That was Paul's job, and Sam hoped Paul did it well.

He hoped that Paul woke Jacob up with a kiss each morning. He hoped they made breakfast together, smiling. He hoped Paul told Jacob he was beautiful before they walked out the door. He hoped they shared time together in silence, just listening to each other's heartbeat. He hoped Paul told Jacob, every night before they fell asleep, that he loved him.

That's what Sam would do if he could. And even though it hurt that there was someone else to do it, Sam knew that Jacob deserved it from _someone_.

Sam studied Jacob's eyes.

They were filled with hope. It was like they were begging for Sam to say something.

Sam smiled.

"Goodnight."

There it was. The biggest mistake of his life.

He turned around to walk away, but not before he glimpsed the smile Jacob gave him.

It was so… Was it even there?

"What were you doing with him?"

"Nothing! He just followed me here!"

"Really? From where? From his bed? I'm just one of your sex toys, huh?"

"No, Paul! You got it all wrong! He just got concerned when he saw me walking alone, and-"

"Yeah, of course! Wouldn't want his pretty little whore to get lost in the dark!"

"Paul, stop it! He was just trying to be nice!"

"But you wanted him to be _nicer _than that, didn't you? Wanted it to be _him _that was fucking you tonight!"

"No! Please, forget Sam. I love you, Paul. I don't want anyone else."

"You better not, Jake. Cause if I ever find you with anyone else, I will kill them. And then I will make you pay, Jake. There are so many things, worse then death."

"You won't ever find me with anyone else, Paul. I promise."

"Why don't I believe you? Tell me. Look me in the eyes and tell me that you don't feel anything for Uley."

"I… He's my friend."

"Do you have a crush on him, babe?"

"Paul, stop it! You're hurting me!"

"Do you want him?"

"Please!"

"Do you love him?"

"Paul… I.. I can't… b-breahte."

"Tell me! Tell me you don't love him! You don't need him! You have me!"

"Paul…"

"You have me."

"…"

"Jacob?"

"Yes… Yes, I love… I loved him…"

"Jacob."

"I loved him…"

Sam looked at something to beautiful to describe.

Like a diamond. A diamond that were stepped on and broken in a million pieces. But still so beautiful.

Jacob didn't have any bruises on his face, just some on his neck. It looked like he was sleeping. His eyes were closed, and his hands were folded.

Sam touched his face. It was cold.

Sam closed his eyes, and thought back to the evening before. It should have been different. He should have done something.

"_Wait!"_ _ Sam called after him and Jacob turned around. His eyes showed hope. Begging for Sam to say something. Something that would stop him from going through that door._

_Jacob was afraid. He was so tired of being beaten. He was tired of the rough sex. He was tired of Paul yelling at him, hurting him._

_But he was too afraid to do anything. He was afraid of what Paul could do if he told anyone what was happening when they weren't looking._

_He remembered showing up with a bruise at Quill's house. The first time Paul had hit him. Because he was canceling a date to meet up with his two best friends._

_He remembered when Paul's lovemaking had turned violent. Remembered when Jacob said he wasn't in the mood, and Paul had forced himself on him. Pushed him down on the bed and ripped the clothes of him._

_And he had left a bruise on his neck for everyone to see._

_Paul would bite his lips so they started bleeding, and he would cut in Jacob with a knife when he got to possessive. He said it was a good way to mark Jacob as his._

_And when he had told his friends about his and Paul's relationship, he hoped that someone would understand. That someone would take a closer look._

_But they did nothing. They just made it worse._

_They hugged him too long, smiled a little too right to him, and Paul would be there. Hurting him._

_So now, Jacob looked back at Sam, hoping that this would be it. This would be the end of it all. Sam would help him. Sam cared._

_Sometimes, Jacob had been so close to telling Sam everything. Not just about him and Paul, but about the way Jacob felt for him. He felt safe with Sam. He felt that Sam could protect him, if he just gave him a chance. If Jacob just could let Sam know Jacob was in need for his protection._

'_Please, Sam,' Jacob thought to himself. So hard that Sam just __**had **__to hear him. 'Please, say something! __**Don't let me go!**__'_

_Sam smiled._

"_Goodnight."_

Sam laid his head on Jacob's chest.

"I'm so sorry, Jacob," he whispered. Tears were falling, streaming down his face. "I should have told you not to go. I should have told you how I feel. I shouldn't have kept it all to myself and expected Paul to take care of you. **I **should have been the one to take care of you. **I **should have done all the things I wanted Paul to do. I should have seen what was going on." Sam closed his eyes. "I love you, Jacob Black."

And then, just as he said it, he heard something. A sound. A sound from within the chest he rested his head on. The sound of a beating heart.


End file.
